i’m in my 20s. that’s what’s it’s all about. figuring out who i am, what i like, what i need, what thoughts/feelings are society’s manifestation in me, and where are my free-thoughts and independent decisions.
i am impressionable, but passionate.
i want to care and i want to do well
and i do care and i try,
but i am also tired and hurt and confused.
i want stability, but regular everyday adventures will be taken, of course.
none of my life before this point was lived for myself; all the (big) decisions i made were either for someone else or influenced by someone else.
i have learned a lot about myself and am also liberated from mandatory/socially obligated schooling, family, parental units, being trapped in toxic environments (school, living with mismatched roommates, work)
i have a running joke with myself that my life is basically all statistics (from my parents to me); although, much of those statistics negatively impacted my life and the lives of others.
i have made mistakes and i have embarrassed myself so often there must be a word for this phenomenon.
i’ve unlearned a lot.
i’ve overcome a lot of internalized hatred (towards myself and other people).
i have learned patience truly is a virtue,
communication and respect are vital.
asking questions is always good.
i have disappeared often.
i have had to cut ties.
i have had to shed many layers
peeling back what was expected of me from others.
and i’m now sculpting my own person.
i am actively seeking healing and my liberation has already set me on track.
i am open
i am ready
i am willing.
i will be resistant at first,
but i need to be challenged.
i want to be challenged,
i want to grow.
i want to do better
and i want to feel better.
and i just want everyone to motherfucking get along already :))